Oh QVC, My Friend....

With my exciting day I'm basking in the warmth in my living room with lots of tea. And watching QVC.

Yep. my life is so exciting that I seek QVC for amusement.
Birkenstock show. In my opinion Birkenstock's are the most unattractive shoe in the world. After those hideous rubber clog creations; Crocks.

The model has a short big toe. Her other toes are shooting off into a different shoe size. It's really disturbing for me to watch. Like, so bad that you're compelled to watch?

I have this longing desire to go to Paris and smoke long, thin cigarettes...

One Potato, Two Potato.... Potato's? I Was Talking About Men.....

I'm beginning to think that my love life is destined to be disastrous.

After holding out for the one man who makes me tingle, you know, the one you think might be the one of all ones, things take a dip...

Just as I'm becoming acclimatised to the idea of Mr Tingle being no more than an illusion, a mere mirage in the desert so-to-speak, well, of course! Suddenly everything becomes more complicated than trying to understand a family tree on Jeremy Kyle.

That's right, another man comes along....

And he... he makes me swoon... Yes, like a princess in a fairytale. Or, a more modern version; like a girl finding a gentleman who holds doors open for her and such. (Yes, this is my weak spot- someone with old fashioned manners) (Can I live in the 50's please?)

So, this guy, he's like Mr Sparkle. He is more than a shining star. He is beautiful, like the North Star in some kind of other-worldly, religious symbolism, angel way.

'What's the problem?!' I hear you say.  'You've got another man, a wonderful one, everything worked out!'

Well, let me tell you, I wouldn't be writing about all this if everything had 'worked out'.
No, because just as I start to think that, guess what happens?

Oh yes! Mr Tingle comes bounding straight back into my life with more charm and gentleman-like qualities than I've seen in years.

And quite simply, I have no idea what to do.

So, there's no nice end point to this entry because, well, who knows what's going to happen? (Please, if someone knows, tell me!)
As they say in American; 'Stay Tuned!'

My friends have started to note that I've been single a long time. They want me to fall in love. Bless.

Equal??

This picture spurred me on a long thought train.


When I first saw it I kind of wanted to be amused by it, as it is kinda true.However, I also wanted to be offended by it, it's almost like it's saying 'It doesn't matter what the hell we do, it'll never be right for womankind.'

It’s strange because sexism isn’t about being the dominant sex, it’s about equality.


I do wonder though, how can this ever be achieved?


There’s no such thing as equality in some parts of life between male and females;
Only females can get pregnant. This is one huge imbalance that can’t be changed. And even if we could choose who carries the baby, someone is still on a different platform regardless of whether it’s the male or female.


With relation to this image I believe that when it comes to love, lust, romance, sex, there is never true equality. In lust and definitely sex, it’s a constant power struggle.

Even when a couple marry and ‘balance’ each other. They’re still not truly equal are they?
We compliment each other and essentially become a yin-yang, seperate but as one.


I just think true equality is a ridiculous and impossible dream.

Men and women are not the same, we do not think the same and we are physically not the same.

Secret Messaging?

Just a quick one....
One thing that doesn't seem to have any 'unwritten rules' that I feel is rather amusing is this:

What is the etiquette on how many kisses to put at the end of a message?
Does there need to be any etiquette? Is it completely insignificant? (NO!) Does everyone just stumble around (so-to-speak) and hope they don't look needy or uninterested? (Am I the only one who wonders this?)



P.S. I am in the middle of writing a longer post, I promise it'll be up soon! (Like anyone religiously reads this anyway *rolls eyes*)

Sex On The Third Date...

Unfortunately I have had little humour in the past while due to working extremely anti-social hours.
I do figure that I need to really update though.

So, to give you the scenario I present one of my friends.She committed the ultimate cardinal sin and slept with a co-worker at the work Christmas do.

Yes. Total cliche/typical.

(When she told me initially I almost fell over laughing.)
(It gets worse.)

She then tells me that she's been hiding behind towels and other such displays all day. Groan.


The next day she tells me they're going on a date.

Yep, her thoughts, just like mine are that; What the hell do you do on a date?!
We are English girls. There are no rules for us English.

We have the usual American ones; don't sleep with a guy on the first date, don't talk about ex's til the third date, don't eat something messy, don't talk too much about yourself, yadda yadda yadda.

But we don't really follow this.
Us English folk like to do things the opposite way. We like to be silly and stupid. If things are too formal and planned it becomes monotonous and dull.

Also how boring is it when you feel like you want to really have a connection with someone and it just becomes so forced?

It goes against every 'dating rule' but to sleep with a guy initally and then get to know them just seems like the best way round.
You find out you have chemistry, the chemistry leads to sex that leads to connection-like hormones being released and instantly all awkwardness is out the window. You don't have to worry about how to act because now you can be completely yourself.

This may sound completely wrong and devoid of any sense but if it doesn't feel right initially then it won't be right.

The point I'm trying to make is;

We shouldn't be acting or forcing anything and we should be trusting our instincts a lot more.